With the commitment ceremony fast approaching, Mama June has been wording invitations on a paper napkin in a sharpie pen. She explains that as long as you have food and music people will come and enjoy themselves. I do agree with her there, although I wouldn’t want my family members to pick up a roadkill animal to serve to my guests! Yuck!
The girls decide to go wedding dress shopping for Mama June and they head out to a very fancy wedding store. Mama June, of course, will not take off her socks (due to her tractor trailer foot) so she looks a bit funny in the gowns. The girls all have paddle boards marked with a “1”, “2”, and “3” to rate the gowns. The first gown which is a strapless a-line dress gets a “2” for “aight.” Mama June really, really likes the second gown she tries on which is a copy cat of Princess Kate’s gown with lace all over and full sleeves. The girls all give it a “3” for “worst” but it actually is very flattering on Mama June, especially since she is a larger woman. Her last option, a strapless, cupcake style dress gets “1”‘s all around and Mama June is stunning with her veil. While the entire room bursts into applause, Mama June reveals that she doesn’t plan on wearing on a white wedding dress. Everyone is astonished and asks her why and she replies that she has never dreamed of her wedding day as a little girl, that this isn’t a “real” wedding, and that she’s not pure. She asks the dress clerk to help her change out of the dress ASAP as she wants to get back into her stretch pants, or “fat girl jeans” as she puts it.
After the dress shopping debacle, Mama June decides it’s time for the family to attempt to get into shape for the commitment ceremony. She explains that home cooking is the easiest way to get into shape and stay healthy because restaurants use too much butter and oil. She says that she enjoys making baked things versus fried things because it’s healthier and better for you. Mind you, as she’s saying all this she is loading a plate of food with at least ten chunks of butter. She reveals that the family is just naturally “big boned” and that their eating habits have very little to do with their size. The smallest of the girls, Anna is the only one who demonstrates healthy eating by eating nuts, fruit, and vegetables daily. Mama June bakes cabbage soup for the girls to try. They all sit down with the soup and begin retching, with Mama June actually running to the bathroom to throw up. Pumpkin ends the trial of healthy eating by saying that “some guys like big girls, like Sugar Bear for example.”
The last step in getting prepared for the big day involves Mama June and Sugar Bear taking a dance class. Prior to heading to the study the entire family has a dance off in the living room which is hysterical to watch because they stay seated on the couch and floor and just move their hands. Mama June and Sugar Bear arrive at the dance study and begin to learn the waltz, but Mama June yells at Sugar Bear for every wrong turn. She explains that Sugar Bear has absolutely no rhythm and that the last time he danced with her was when they did the horizontal bump, eight years ago (Alana’s age.) She explains that she has trust issues on top of her control issues and that she has been second guessing going through with this ceremony. She feels it’s more like the end than the beginning and that she doesn’t necessarily have cold feet but that she is thinking she shouldn’t do it some times.
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